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Focusing on the well-being of your kids during divorce

Photo of Karen Lavin

The end of a marriage can be a stressful and challenging period for everyone involved. Now that you and your spouse have decided to take separate paths moving forward, you may have concerns about how the outcome of your divorce will impact your future, especially if you have children.

As a parent, you likely consider the well-being of your kids to be extremely important. Unfortunately, divorce can be fraught with emotions, potentially prompting you to search for guidance in shielding your young ones from harm.

Safeguarding the well-being of kids in divorce

Even if you aren't on the best of terms with the other parent, focusing on what is important, rather than personal feelings, is likely the best course of action. How well your kids adapt to their new situation could depend on how you handle the divorce, and some crucial areas to consider during this period may include the following:

  • Timing of divorce:  When seeking to protect children from suffering, the timing of your divorce could be key as breaking the news during times where kids have less going on in life could be beneficial.
  • Present living arrangement:  You and the other parent may be attempting to remain in the same house during this period, perhaps to protect your children from harm. While this may work temporarily, if it causes tension, the kids may benefit more if you come up with other arrangements.
  • Avoiding conflict:  Fighting with the other parent, especially in front of the kids, could do a great deal of harm, and even if you are careful not to argue when they are around, you may want to avoid speaking of each other in their presence.
  • Temporary custody orders:  To reduce conflict, you could consider implementing a temporary custody arrangement that determines visitation until you reach a more permanent agreement during legal proceedings.
  • Controlling emotions:  Although divorce is a highly emotional period, any outbursts could spill over to your kids, potentially causing them to suffer in the process.

If you and the other parent can reach an acceptable parenting plan through peaceful negotiations, the children may benefit from the lack of contention. However, such issues can be highly contestable, and seeking guidance early on could prove beneficial in preparing for the road ahead.

Obtaining advice

With numerous crucial factors to consider during the end of a marriage, you could be feeling somewhat overwhelmed and intimidated by the process. You could choose to speak with someone with extensive knowledge in Illinois child custody laws, as well as every other aspect of divorce, for guidance on the best course of action to take. Obtaining advice early on could prove crucial in pursuing the most favorable outcome possible during divorce proceedings.

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