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Flourishing during divorce

Photo of Karen Lavin


The holiday season is a time of joy and happiness for many Illinoisans, a time to celebrate with family and, especially, friends. But not everyone enjoys the season. For some, it can be a painful reminder of tough times just passed or still ongoing for those engaged in the divorce process. But fortunately, while divorce can be tough, Illinoisans can get through it, and even succeed at it.

People generally do not think of success and divorce in the same sentence. But it's possible. How? First, identify what success looks like. In other words, Illinoisans must identify what they want. Do they want the kids, the house, to move forward. Something else?

Second, honor one's values. Separation and divorce have a way of throwing people off kilter. For so many years, a divorcing person's identity was intertwined with their relationship. But with the end of the relationship, that changes. When it does, it is important to take stock and decide what is important and what is not.

Once Illinoisans know what success looks like and the values that matter to them, they need to follow through, take steps to pursue those choices. That often can be hardest part because acting on the choices can require moving forward in the face of fear and confusion.

But Illinoisans do not have to take those steps alone. Illinoisans going through a divorce should consider discussing their situation with an experienced divorce attorney. Doing so can be essential to working through many of the complicated issues that inevitably arise during a divorce, issues such as alimony, child custody and property division.

Source: Huffington Post, "How To Succeed At Divorce (Yes, It's Possible!)," Laura Mioilla, Dec. 1, 2013

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